4th of July Giveaway (I'm in great company!)

NEWSFLASH: This competition is now over. 

A giant CONGRATULATIONS to Jeanine who has not only scored herself 21 Amazon giftcards (at $10 each no less), she has also scored 21 FREE mystery e-books from 21 of the brightest writers across the globe. Jeanine's kindle must be jam-packed and groaning with pleasure! 

Well played, J.

xo CA

I love my American friends, and I love my American author friends even more! Not only have they been so incredibly inclusive— sharing writerly advice, issues, inspiration and feedback— they're a lot of fun and, gasp, incredibly successful.

Some of my mystery author Facebook friends are consistently on Amazon's Top 10 best-seller lists. They clearly have a mammoth fan base and they write and sell squillions of books.

But that's not what I love about them.

What I love is the fact that they always take the time—usually while in the middle of writing another best-seller— to answer my crazy author queries, like:

"Help! I'm desperate for book reviews, how do you get so many?!" 

and 

"I need to kill someone with very little blood splatter, any tips?"

They're a constant, comforting shoulder to cry on but know just when to tell me to suck it up, sit back at my keyboard and keep on going (love that about the Amercians!) And they have the most surprising sense of humour, often sharing posts that leave me giggling like a schoolgirl (usually involving coffee, chocolate and cuddly creatures).

That's why, when they asked me to be involved in their latest giveway - a mega 4th of July 'Rafflecopter' - I couldn't say "yes!" fast enough.

I'm in illustrious company. Joining me in this uber generous comp are Big Guns like Kathi Daley, Dianne Harman, Julie Moffett, Tonya Kappes, Ritter Ames and Duncan Whitehead to name just a few (pls check out the full glittering list below).

For those who want to be in the running, 

here's what it involves:

* 21 authors

* 21 ebooks

* $210 in Amazon Gift Cards

* And one Grand Prize Winner!

The contest runs until midnight on July 4 and the winner will be announced the following day. Gift cards are in US dollars from Amazon.com

For more information, head to the website, pop in your entry and keep those fingers crossed.

Until July 4... Happy reading (and book winning) everyone!

xo Christina

4TH OF JULY GIVEAWAY - PARTICIPATING AUTHORS
* Kathi Daley
* Dianne Harman
* Anna Celeste Burke
* Leslie Langtry
* Ritter Ames
* Duncan Whitehead
* Julie Mulhern
* Julie Seedorf
* Tonya Kappes
* Maggie West
* Jane Firebaugh
* C.A.Larmer
* Cassidy Salem
* Zanna Mackenzie
* Leigh Selfman
* Linda Crowder
* Julie Moffett
* Christa Nardi
* Maureen Howard
* Diane Rapp
* Pam Kelley

xo

4th of July Giveaway (I'm in great company!)

NEWSFLASH: This compeition is now over. 

A giant CONGRATULATIONS to Jeanine who has not only scored herself 21 Amazon giftcards (at $10 each no less), she has also scored 21 FREE mystery e-books from 21 of the brightest writers across the globe. Jeanine's kindle must be jam-packed and groaning with pleasure! 

Well played, J.

xo CA

I love my American friends, and I love my American author friends even more! Not only have they been so incredibly inclusive— sharing writerly advice, issues, inspiration and feedback— they're a lot of fun and, gasp, incredibly successful.

Some of my mystery author Facebook friends are consistently on Amazon's Top 10 best-seller lists. They clearly have a mammoth fan base and they write and sell squillions of books.

But that's not what I love about them.

What I love is the fact that they always take the time—usually while in the middle of writing another best-seller— to answer my crazy author queries, like:

"Help! I'm desperate for book reviews, how do you get so many?!" 

and 

"I need to kill someone with very little blood splatter, any tips?"

They're a constant, comforting shoulder to cry on but know just when to tell me to suck it up, sit back at my keyboard and keep on going (love that about the Amercians!) And they have the most surprising sense of humour, often sharing posts that leave me giggling like a schoolgirl (usually involving coffee, chocolate and cuddly creatures).

That's why, when they asked me to be involved in their latest giveway - a mega 4th of July 'Rafflecopter' - I couldn't say "yes!" fast enough.

I'm in illustrious company. Joining me in this uber generous comp are Big Guns like Kathi Daley, Dianne Harman, Julie Moffett, Tonya Kappes, Ritter Ames and Duncan Whitehead to name just a few (pls check out the full glittering list below).

For those who want to be in the running, 

here's what it involves:

* 21 authors

* 21 ebooks

* $210 in Amazon Gift Cards

* And one Grand Prize Winner!

The contest runs until midnight on July 4 and the winner will be announced the following day. Gift cards are in US dollars from Amazon.com

For more information, head to the website, pop in your entry and keep those fingers crossed.

Until July 4... Happy reading (and book winning) everyone!

xo Christina

4TH OF JULY GIVEAWAY - PARTICIPATING AUTHORS
* Kathi Daley
* Dianne Harman
* Anna Celeste Burke
* Leslie Langtry
* Ritter Ames
* Duncan Whitehead
* Julie Mulhern
* Julie Seedorf
* Tonya Kappes
* Maggie West
* Jane Firebaugh
* C.A.Larmer
* Cassidy Salem
* Zanna Mackenzie
* Leigh Selfman
* Linda Crowder
* Julie Moffett
* Christa Nardi
* Maureen Howard
* Diane Rapp
* Pam Kelley

xo

Thinking of writing a book? Proceed with caution...

Thinking of writing a book? Great. Now take a deep breath, get over yourself, and back away from that pen!

Sound harsh?

I moonlight (by day) as a book editor and if there's one thing I've learned it's that, while everyone might have a book in them—all humans have stories to share, and share they should—not everyone should actually be writing one.

I don't say that out of malice or meanspiritedness. I say that as an editor who has spent countless hours wading through endless pages of absolute dross, trying to knock them into some kind of shape.

And it pisses me off.

Sorry, but, hey, let's all get a grip. We need to know our limitations, surely? We can pretend to live in a world where everything is possible, but actually it's not. Not really.

I can't run more than a few metres without giggling and spluttering, so I'm not entering any racing meets anytime soon. Nor should I. I can't waitress to save myself. I tried it, several times. My tips were brilliant—only because I was so appalling, the poor punters felt sorry for me—but I was bloody hopeless. As I snapped corks inside wine bottles and splashed sauces all over patrons, I quickly learned, this was not the job for me. Which was a pity because I was backpacking through Europe and really needed the cash. But I stopped and applied for jobs on the local rags instead, where I flourished.

Similarly, I'm pretty sure I'd make a dreadful nurse, accountant, engineer and architect. I can't play a tune to save my life so music's out, and don't get me started on my building, gardening and PR skills.

Some things are out of my scope. Some things are beyond me. And while I can always have a crack, I'd be better off hiring someone to do all of the above for me, and focusing on what I do fairly competently - writing, editing, self-publishing and journalism. I'm not saying I'm brilliant at all of those things, but I can pull them off. Some people can't even come close.

Yet still they try

So many people think that writing is one of those things that everyone can do. It's no longer deemed a professional skill, which it once was. It's now open slather. A cinch!

Got a great story in you? Just jot it down and make a motza. Start a blog. Write your memoir and bore family senseless with extraordinarily poor writing, sentence structure, punctuation and descriptions.

This flippant attitude to writing is, frankly, patronising to those of us who do it for a living. And it's annoying as all hell.

My experience editing other people's books shows, in no uncertain terms, that you can put lipstick on a pig but that doesn't change the fact that it's still a pig. Oink, oink!

Sorry, that's the truth.

And yes, sure, good on you for having a go! Really, it does take time, effort (blood and tears), or it should if you're doing it properly. But if you're failing at it, if it's just not working, if there's more red ink on the page than black, it's okay to admit that you JUST CAN'T DO IT. So wave the white flag, hand the manuscript over to a professional, and get on with what YOU do best. Your day job, I'd suggest.

Stephen King said it beautifully in the bible on this subject: On Writing: A Memoir

"No matter how much I want to encourage the man or woman trying for the first time to write seriously, I can't lie and say there are no bad writers. Sorry, but there are lots of bad writers. Some are on staff at your local newspaper… Some have scribbled their way to homes in the Caribbean, leaving a trail of pulsing adverbs, wooden characters, and vile passive-voice constructions behind them…

It is impossible to make a competent writer out of a bad writer… it is possible, with lots of hard work, dedication, and timely help, to make a good writer out of a merely competent one."

This is important so listen up: I'm not talking about a good writer or a merely competent writer here. I am talking about the bad writer, of which there are many currently attempting to write books.

Just say no

If you are a bad writer—and, deep down, you probably know if you are—then pop your pen aside, hand your story to someone else to write, and get on with something else. King suggests washing the car (ouch!)

Harsh? Yes. True? Yes! And the truth can really hurt.

What do you think?

Jot me a comment and join the debate. I'm always keen to hear from you, and I promise I won't criticise your writing, at least not in the comment section  :-)

Happy reading (and writing if it's in you), everyone!

xo Christina

20 FREE copies of new e-book to giveaway!

With the launch of my new Agatha Christie Book Club—Murder on the Orient (SS)—I'm giving my devoted blog readers a chance to win one of 20 free copies of the e-book!

That's right, baby, TWENTY!!

All you have to do—and it's uber easy—is jot down the name of your favourite Agatha Christie Book. I mean, really? Could it be an easier?

Do you adore Murder on the Orient Express, as I do? Is Evil Under the Sun a smarter choice? What about something more cryptic like The ABC Murders or Peril at End House?

Dame Christie wrote around 82 detective novels, so you've got plenty of books to choose from.

Just jot the title in the comment box below or, if you'd like more privacy, via a direct email to me, and I'll get back to you if you're one of the first 20: christina.larmer@gmail.com

That's right—there is no right or wrong answer. Just get in quick!

I promise NOT to use your name and email for any other purpose so please don't worry about that. I just want to share my story with other Christie fanatics, and I want to do it fast.

So, let's recap…

Six Steps to Success

Step 1: Stop screaming at this wondrous opportunity and get a grip!
Step 2: Think about all of the Dame's many fantastic whodunnits and decide which one takes the cake. Can't recall them all? Try: the Agatha Christie website or Wikipedia.
Step 3: Write down the name of that chosen book in the comment box below, or via email to me.
Step 4: Sit back, take a breath and wait to hear if you're the lucky winner. (Gasp.)
Step 5: If you ARE the lucky winner, just let me know which format you prefer (for Kindle, iPad etc) and wait for it to be emailed directly to you.
Step 6: Download the book then sit back, take a breath, and enjoy the read :-)

Good luck everyone and thanks, once again, for all your support! I couldn't have done it without you.

xo Christina

This Black Friday the real SS Orient is back from the dead!

Today I'm donning my finest boat shoes and popping on the captain's hat for the official launch of the Agatha Christie Book Club 2—Murder on the Orient (SS). But don't worry! 

I'm not going to bore you senseless with a sales pitch here—check out your preferred e-retailer for that. Instead I'm going to remind you where I got the idea from and how true synchronicity works, courtesy of my Author's Note from the book (see below). 

I think the backstory is almost as fascinating as my novel. Damn, there I go with the sales pitch…

S.S Orient (5,390 tons),  Orient liner which made its maiden voyage to
                     Australia in 1879. From a lithograph after T.G. Dutton at the National
                     Maritime Museum, Greenwich, U.K. (PAH5285) 

Murder on the Orient (SS): A Note from the Author

"When I started conjuring up the second adventure for the Agatha Christie Book Club I wanted to take them on an exotic journey à la the infamous Orient Express, one of my favourite Poirot settings, and began looking around for ideas.

Boy, did I get lucky!

In the early 1900s, there really was a classic steamship called the SS Orient that sailed between London and Sydney, via the Suez Canal and The Cape. According to my research, it was a gleaming ship, full of glamorous characters and several rather dubious deaths, and proved a perfect fit for my book club friends. While I have changed some details, including the original itinerary, for the sake of this contemporary plot, much of the information about the ship is authentic and can be found in the bibliography.

Sadly, however, the SS Orient has not been recommissioned nor is there a real-life replica floating about as I have imagined here, but an author can dream can’t she?

And a book club can jump aboard for the ride…

Bon voyage!"

For more info on the (real) SS Orient 

 

The SS Orient Story by Roy Clifford and Dave Knight

http://collections.museumvictoria.com.au/items/404048

http://www.clydesite.co.uk/clydebuilt/viewship.asp?id=1263

http://www.bogstown.com/ss-orient/

Happy reading, everyone, and I hope you enjoy the voyage.

xo Christina

FIVE free copies of Agatha Christie Book Club up for grabs

I've got a touch of the Excitements and it's getting infectious! Just four sleeps to go until the official launch of my second Agatha Christie Book Club— Murder on the Orient (SS), which is now available for pre-order at Amazon and Smashwords.

The book will be on sale from Friday, May 13.

To celebrate, I prescribe a good dose of Book 1—The Agatha Christie Book Club (original cover pictured below).

If you haven't already read it, or you'd like a copy of the paperback version, then here's your chance.

I'm giving away FIVE free copies at Goodreads.

***The competition opens Monday, May 9 and closes June 9 and all Goodreads subscribers are welcome to enter. ***

If you haven't already, this is your chance to catch the Agatha Christie Book Club bug.

If you're not a member of Goodreads but you'd also like a chance to win a free copy of the first book, get in touch here and I will set up a separate competition just for you. But you do need to contact me ASAP.

Until then, good luck and happy (feverish) reading everyone!

xo Christina

The true story behind the real SS Orient

“The SS Orient, kiddoes! It’s a sign from Dame Christie herself!”

Missy Corner, Murder on the Orient (SS)

At last, here it is... 

If you enjoyed the first book or are just looking for a classic whodunnit, the Agatha Christie Book Club is back, this time on a nautical adventure called Murder on the Orient (SS), now available for pre-order at Amazon.

Murder on the Orient (SS) follows our beloved book lovers as they embark on a "quiet cruise" (cough, cough) between Sydney, Australia and Auckland in New Zealand.

Naturally, the first dead body shows up within 24 hours, but it's not really until a second body goes missing—this time with a loud squeal and an ominous splash overboard in the dead of night—that the club decides to pull on their Poirot mo' and investigate.

Based on a real ship

Like all my mysteries, this one was a lot of fun to write, but it was even more fun to research. Anyone who knows me, knows I love to sink my teeth into crusty old documents, dusty old reference books, and pages and pages of web material to get at the truth.

I'm a research junkie with no desire to kick the habit.

And this book was research (Acapulco) gold. The SS Orient really does exist. Or it did, back in 1879 when it was first built. And while the steamship only sailed a mere 30 years or so, mostly between London and "the colonies", it was also literary gold as far as I was concerned.

I quickly created a modern-day replica of the SS Orient and lured my book club aboard.

Not only does the ship have the perfect name—“The SS Orient, kiddoes! It’s a sign from Dame Christie herself!”—it was the ideal setting for an old-fashioned style whodunnit, the kind of ship Dame Christie (Miss Marple or Poirot) might have voyaged on had the opportunity come up.

It's elegantly designed and decorated and has few mod cons like CCTV and WiFi to get in the way of a good story. After all, there's no chance of sneaking into someone's cabin to bump them off on the Pacific Princess what with all those pesky cameras catching your every move.

Based on a favourite story

Now that I had the setting I just needed a great plot and I may—or may not—have borrowed from the Queen of Crime. I wanted there to be echoes of the original Murder on the Orient Express without being a carbon copy. Some elements are similar, some are wildly different, and Agatha Christie aficionados will enjoy a little trainspotting as the story progresses.

Just don't expect it to be handed to you on a silver platter. Like Christie's books, I provide a stack of clues and some fishy red herrings to keep you guessing right until the 'great reveal' at the end.

Or at least that's the plan.

I'd love to hear your thoughts once you've read the book. For now, jot me a line and let me know what you think of the cover, the setting and the basic premise of the story. Or simply sign up for your early copy at Amazon here.

Murder on the Orient (SS) will be officially launched on Friday, May 13. Yep, that's black Friday.

Unlucky for some.

If you haven't read the first in the series, The Agatha Christie Book Club, grab a copy now or look out for future discounts. There'll be plenty of those.

Until then, happy (retro) reading, everyone!
xo Christina